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LEFT prepares itself, clears throat etc. It speaks to van Gogh in a measured tone.

LEFT               Vanzon? Might I exchange some words with you? The burnt umber beneath the rolling veronese and veridian green and the lemon and cadmium yellow beneath the cobalt blue and zinc white above are all calling out to you as indeed am I with my comrade here, Right, calling you to take action and to raise yourself from your posterior into a horizontal position and-


LEFT               I was getting through to him there. Why did you have to go and ruin it?

RIGHT              Sometimes you need to just get to the point and less of the fancy words-

LEFT               You are so impetuous sometimes!

RIGHT              Bet that’s not even a real word-

LEFT               It is! And words are how we get on, and move forward.

RIGHT              So where are the other words for my (singing) LEFT RIGHT RIGHT LEFT RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT LEFT LEFT RIGHT music?

LEFT has no response.


RIGHT              He just doesn’t like movers. He would probably prefer us not to move at all. It was different in Paris. Like those little people and trees.


LEFT               That’s right Right, a place, a street, lots and lots of people. And trees, it looked like the place where the one before ‘him’ was moving.

RIGHT              That was a, oh, what did he call it? A small place, the trees were much smaller. And the people didn’t move.

LEFT              You’re right-

RIGHT              I know. He called it something, some thing pain. Pain-Thing.

LEFT               Painting.  


RIGHT              Yes, and he had that at home when he was staring squinting at us all day.

LEFT              You’re right, and then he put the painting on that object where he stands, or sits?

RIGHT              His ‘eas-sick’.

LEFT               Eas-el.

RIGHT              That easy-thingy, he still just says nothing when he is beside it moving his hands around and looking, doing nothing. And if he did say something, we would understand nothing because he doesn’t speak French with us.


LEFT              You’re right

RIGHT             I know I am right

LEFT               I mean that you are correct right, right as in correct

RIGHT             Oh right.

LEFT              Correct.

RIGHT              Wait. Does that mean that all the other times you said I was right, you meant that I was correct?


LEFT              What do you mean?

RIGHT              I mean did you say right as in correct, or that that is my position? Left right left right left right?


LEFT               No, it can’t be that. You’re not always right, even if you always are Right… Does that mean that when you say left that you mean my position or that I am left, still here?

RIGHT              No, it can’t be that. We’re both left, both still here.

LEFT              You’re right.

RIGHT             And you’re left.

LEFT               Good we sorted that out. Something accomplished for today. Might be the only thing we get accomplished today.

end of excerpt

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